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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25677541">the best of us</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/CapnWinghead/pseuds/CapnWinghead'>CapnWinghead</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Marvel Cinematic Universe</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe, Anti-Mutant Sentiments (Marvel), Human Experimentation, Kid Fic, M/M, Mutant Powers, Nightmares, Parenthood, Wingfic</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 05:21:44</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,391</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25677541</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/CapnWinghead/pseuds/CapnWinghead</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>SHIELD gets word of illegal experimentation on mutant and inhuman children. The case hits home for Sam. In the process of a rescue mission, Bucky finds out a lot more about his partner.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>James "Bucky" Barnes/Sam Wilson</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>163</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>the best of us</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>A warning: there is mention of children that died in the process of experimentation in this story. It's rather brief, but if that sort of thing is hard to read about, you might want to avoid this story. </p><p>Also, there's quite a few mentions of anti-mutant ideas and mentions of racism. </p><p>For Day 2 of AU August. Prompt: Wings.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sam Wilson was incredibly secretive.</p><p>When Bucky came to live with him, he noticed that first.</p><p>It started with noticing little things like the way Sam always changed in the privacy of his own room, the bathroom or a stall in HQ; always with the door closed. The way Sam always wore long sleeves, even in hundred-degree summer heat. The way he never let anyone get too close to him when his back was turned, even Bucky.</p><p>Initially, Bucky figured it was a sign of distrust. While it hurt, Bucky was used to it.</p><p>Sam may have agreed to be his partner and he may have even welcomed Bucky into his home, but none of that meant Sam trusted him. After all, this job was important and Sam had always been willing to sacrifice his comfort for the sake of the job.</p><p>Bucky played a necessary role in Sam’s life, but Sam didn’t trust him. Not really.</p><p>He’d put on a brave face, share bits of his past that sounded personal, but in retrospect, really weren’t. He’d tell Bucky things like what it was like growing up in the church, lament the way his apple pies never came out anything like his mom’s, and complain about the way his old neighborhood had been turned into a hipster spot for rich douchebags.</p><p>However, he wouldn’t tell Bucky about the seventeen identical long sleeve t-shirts he had in the back of his closet. He wouldn’t tell Bucky about the pictures of him standing beside some blond guy that he kept buried deep in his drawers. He wouldn’t tell Bucky why all of his childhood stories gave the impression Sam spent all of his time alone until high school. Instead, he’d keep offering little pieces of his life knowing they would never add up to a complete puzzle.</p><p>Sam preferred it that way.</p><p>So, Bucky forced his frustration down, told himself not to get too greedy. After all, he was lucky just to have Sam in his life at all. He was lucky to work beside him, to live with him, to be what he’d cautiously refer to as a friend. Sam may not ever trust him, but they weren’t enemies. Bucky would take what he could.</p><p>He was moving through the halls in HQ one morning, late for one of Fury’s briefings but, what was new? He would’ve caught a ride with Sam, but Sam had planned on going in a few hours early and Bucky actually liked sleep.</p><p>As he walked, he overheard a few agents moving past. “… bunch of freaks. I mean, I get that we work with some of them but there’s a difference between that hot chick Daisy and one of Professor X’s blue frog people, you know what I mean? Enough is enough. Where do we draw the line?”</p><p>Bucky stopped, glaring at the man as he passed, his fist flexing. The man’s eyes widened as he quickly moved past, his face paling.</p><p>When Bucky entered the briefing room, he immediately knew something was off.  For one thing, the tension in the room was palpable. Hill stood at attention knew the front, jaw tensed. Daisy Johnson stood of to the side, her lips turned in like she was biting her tongue. And Sam, Sam sat in the front, his face drawn, eyes focused dead ahead as if he was seeing through the screen.</p><p>Fury spoke, “We think the subjects are being held there in von Strucker’s labs, but seeing as we’re still waiting for the O.K. from British ops—”</p><p>“This is bullshit!” Daisy burst out, arms crossed.</p><p>“Johnson,” Hill began.</p><p>“You know I’m right.” Daisy strode forward, standing in front of Sam’s chair. “Listen to me, Wilson. You know I’m right. You know the likelihood that that asshole will hear what we’re planning. He’ll pack up and leave before we can even get on a plane and we will never see those kids again.”</p><p>Sam looked to Fury, his voice firm. “I’m going.”</p><p>Fury stared up at the ceiling, sighing internally. “Wilson, you can’t.”</p><p>“Someone has to.”</p><p>“Let it be someone else not dressed as a big ass flag. This is exactly what got Rogers into trouble.”</p><p>“Except, this time, we’re not getting into a fight in a parking lot. We’re saving a bunch of kids from being treated like lab rats,’ he spat.</p><p>“A bunch of freaks,” an agent muttered.</p><p>Sam flinched, turning his head towards the voice. Agent Pratt barely had time to speak before Bucky had him out of his chair and against the wall, forearm pressed to his throat.</p><p>“What did you say?” he hissed.</p><p>Pratt’s eyes widened, looking from Bucky to Fury. Fury stared at him. “I can’t help you,” he said. He scanned the room. “Anybody else agree with Pratt? No? Nobody else thinks we should leave these kids to die?”</p><p>The room was silent. Pratt’s face was turning purple, his boots scrabbling along the wall before a hand touched Bucky’s shoulder. “Let him go, man. He’s not worth it,” Sam said.</p><p>Grimacing, Bucky reluctantly let the man go. Pratt slid down the wall, choking as he struggled to catch his breath. “What’s wrong with you?” he panted.</p><p>“What’s wrong with me?” Bucky repeated, fist clenching.</p><p>“Pratt, just get the hell out. And clean out your locker while you’re at it,” Hill said.</p><p>The man climbed to his feet with a parting glare for Bucky. The door slammed shut as Fury spoke up again, “Wilson, you will wait for permission. I don’t like it any more than you do, but these kids’ only shot at rescue is a full team of operatives and we can’t send a full team into a country uninvited.”</p><p>Sam’s jaw tensed but he nodded once. “Yes, sir.”</p><p>He left the room, his head down. Bucky itched to follow but he forced himself to stay put. Daisy came over, whispering, “What are the odds Sam leaves this alone?”</p><p>“He’s never disobeyed a direct order. That’s more my style.” The corner of his mouth turned up, “He’s annoyingly good.”</p><p>Daisy smiled. “Shame.” She touched his shoulder as she left.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Bucky didn’t see Sam for the rest of the day, but that wasn’t unusual. On days the city didn’t need Captain America and the Winter Soldier, they spent a large part of the day apart.</p><p>Bucky trained, made runs to the grocery store or napped. Sam spent his days leading meetings, running groups at the VA or training. Bucky was honestly jealous that he spent so much of his time in the skies.</p><p>When Bucky arrived home that day, his arms were full of groceries. He should’ve made more than one trip but he was stubborn. He nearly tipped over trying to kick the door shut. “Sam?” he called out, sloppily setting them on the counter.  He had nearly everything put away when he realized Sam had never responded. “Sam?”</p><p>He walked the apartment, checking the small gym and the laundry room before heading to Sam’s bedroom. “You home?” He knocked on the door but there was no response.</p><p>Sam’s number went straight to voicemail. He started to send a text when his phone rang, Sharon’s face coming up. “Shar?”</p><p>“Where are you?” she cut in, her voice tight.</p><p>“At home. Why?”</p><p>“Is Sam with you?”</p><p>“No. Why?” he felt a chill in his blood.</p><p>“He sent the signal.” At Bucky’s silence, she continued. “<em>The</em> signal. When we split up after – after Pierce, we had a signal. Sam, Steve and I. Nothing big. Just a flag. To make sure none of us ever got into something too big to handle without SHIELD. He sent me the flag.”</p><p>It stung that Bucky had never been brought in on the signal, but he’d deal with that later. “How long ago?”</p><p>“Two minutes. I thought you’d know what it was about.”</p><p>Cursing, Bucky grabbed his holster and jacket. “I think I do. How quickly can you get a jet?”</p><p>“Six minutes.”</p><p>Wait. “How quickly can you steal a jet?”</p><p>No questions asked. “Four minutes.”</p><p>Bucky smiled. “Meet me on the rooftop.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Sharon was an excellent pilot. Bucky was at a loss to find something she couldn’t do, honestly.</p><p>He sat beside her, his boot bouncing repetitively on the floor. Her eyes fell to it before she returned to the skies, politely not mentioning it.</p><p>“He do this a lot?” She shifted controls, her voice low. “Run off alone?”</p><p>“No. This is the first time.” Perhaps because Sam would never trust Bucky the way he had Steve. Honestly, would this have happened if someone else had been Sam’s partner? If it had been Hill or Sharon?</p><p>“Steve must’ve rubbed off on him,” she said with a smile. Her gaze sharpened as she reached up to flick a switch. “We’re close. I’ll have to touch down several feet away. There’s no safe place to land closer to the labs and we don’t want to announce ourselves. You think Fury got the right estimate on the number of guards?”</p><p>“Considering there’s only two of us and he was predicting sixty, I hope not,” he replied.</p><p>They touched down and quickly moved through the forest. Sharon had the foresight to steal two comms and, once again, Bucky was eternally grateful. She headed south while he went to the north end. His only hope was that one of them found Sam in time to sneak out with little fanfare. The two of them against sixty armed guards wouldn’t end well.</p><p>Two guards were circling the entrance. Bucky took them out quickly and quietly, pocketing their key cards and knocking their guns away. The halls were a stark, blinding white, clinical and creepy. The air cycling through was chilling, making him shiver in his gear. His boots sounded on the floor as he moved quickly through the hall.</p><p>When he turned the corner, there were two paths. The right lead to the basements and server rooms, if his German was right. The left led to the labs and exam rooms. Stomach twisting, he headed left.</p><p>“Barnes? I’m in the basement. You know what they were doing here?”</p><p>“Experiments on kids, from the sound of it.”</p><p>He came to a door, peeking inside. It was empty. The next, he found a few scientists typing away at computers.</p><p>“On mutant and inhuman kids,” she said, her voice tight. “They were trying to create injections. They kill the subjects when they’re done with them.”</p><p>Bucky came to another room.</p><p>“It’s a morgue,” Sharon finished wanly.</p><p>Two armed men stood, rifles pointed at some sort of massive red bird. Bucky burst inside, slamming his weight into the man on the end and knocking him into the other. One of them managed to fire off two shots into the ceiling, a high-pitched scream sounding before Bucky jammed his knee into the man’s arm, snapping his elbow. He disarmed the other, a hand crunching beneath his boot.</p><p>“Buck?” Sam called out.</p><p>Calming, Bucky turned. His words stuck in his throat.</p><p>Sam sat on the floor, curled around a small girl with dark skin and curly hair. Both surrounded by bright, crimson wings, feathers littering the floor. The wings fluttered a bit, curling closer around Sam and the girl protectively. These weren’t tech wings, they were real.</p><p>They were Sam’s.</p><p>Bucky stared in shock, at a loss for words. “Barnes? Barnes, what’s happening down there? Did you find Sam?”</p><p>Swallowing, Bucky touched a finger to his ear. “Yeah, I found him. He’s okay.”</p><p>Sharon’s relief was audible. “Great. Good. I’ll meet you outside.” He could hear the smile in her voice.</p><p>“Buck,” Sam began, tensing. “I can explain.”</p><p>“There’s no time. We have to go.” He blinked, forcing his eyes away. Grabbing an abandoned lab coat, he waited as Sam and the girl stood. “Let’s get you covered up.”</p><p>As Sam stood, the wings retracted. Spreading out with a flourish before pulling back and slowly fading into his skin. Bucky tried to keep from staring, but it was hard. Sam was shirtless, standing there in nothing but his uniform pants. Bucky had never seen this much of his skin before. The intricate dark markings embedded in his skin were entirely new to him.</p><p>Sam draped the coat over the girl’s back. Bucky caught a glimpse of dark blue feathers before she was covered.</p><p>Poking his head out into the hall, Bucky quickly scanned it before giving them the go ahead. “It’s clear. Let’s go.”</p><p>The little girl grabbed Sam’s hand.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Sharon greeted Sam with a hug and the girl with a warm smile as she herded them into the jet.</p><p>She stopped Bucky on his way up the ramp. “Everything okay?”</p><p>He nodded, even as his stomach rolled. “I’m fine. Sam’s okay.” Really, that was all that mattered.</p><p>“Why do you look like you’ve seen a ghost?”</p><p>Behind her, Sam was watching him with an indecipherable look. Bucky shook his head. “I’m just tired. That’s all.”</p><p>The ride was mostly silent except that Bucky could hear the girl asking Sam questions. “Who’s that lady?”</p><p>“That’s Sharon. She’s a really great friend.”</p><p>“She flies planes?” she whispered in awe.</p><p>“And lots of other stuff.”</p><p>“That’s so cool!”</p><p>Sam laughed, the sound warm and bringing a smile to Bucky’s face. “It’s very cool.”</p><p>“The man?”</p><p>“That’s Bucky.”</p><p>“He’s a friend?”</p><p>Bucky tensed, waiting for the answer. “He’s a hero,” Sam said, his voice full with pride. “I’m proud to call him my friend.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Back at their apartment building, Sharon said her goodbyes.</p><p>“Are you going to tell Fury?” Sam asked hesitantly. “I understand if you have to.”</p><p>“Fury owes me a few favors. He doesn’t need to know.” She grinned at the little girl, offering a wave as she headed up the ramp. “Take care of the little cutie, okay? For me?”</p><p>Sam waved his goodbye, propping the girl higher up on his hip as she took off. “Any chance Fury doesn’t hear about a jet on our rooftop?” Sam asked quietly.</p><p>“Nope.” Bucky turned to him. The girl had fallen asleep, her head on Sam’s shoulder. “She have a name?”</p><p>“Mia,” Sam replied, his face drawn. “She’s the last one.”</p><p>Bucky’s chest tightened. “Fury shouldn’t have waited.”</p><p>“He didn’t really have a choice. We can’t just slip people in the way we used to. I probably shouldn’t have gone but,” he trailed off.</p><p>“You did the right thing.” He watched her sleep, remembering what Sharon found in the basement. It wasn’t a question – even knowing there’d be hell to pay tomorrow, Bucky would’ve done it all again. They’d managed to save her.</p><p>When he returned to Sam, his eyes were warm. “You think so?” Bucky nodded. “Thanks, man.”</p><p>They headed down the stairwell to their apartment. When they got inside, Sam lad Mia down on the couch, covering her with a blanket. She turned into the pillows, revealing a set of dark blue wings that were a fraction the size of Sam’s.</p><p>“They usually don’t reach full wingspan until the early twenties. From what I read, anyway,” Sam said. “My guess, she’s about three.”</p><p>They set about locking up, making sure there wasn’t anything dangerous out that Mia could find. It was a given she’d stay here until they could contact Child Services. When they’d stalled as much as they possibly could, Bucky finally bit the bullet.</p><p>In the kitchen, he turned to Sam, his voice rough. “Why didn’t you ask me?” Sam’s eyes widened, holding his gaze. “To go with you?”</p><p>Sam’s mouth quirked as he scratched at his brow. Crossing his arms, he leaned against the opposite counter. “You would’ve said yes.”</p><p>At Bucky’s face he sighed his stomach tensing as he breathed. He was still shirtless and it felt wrong somehow, seeing him this bare. “Look, man, I knew this was risky but I had to go. Considering how dangerous it was, knew I couldn’t’ bring you into it,” he explained. His eyes were open and honest. That only made this worse.</p><p>“I don’t care how dangerous it was. I care about you, Sam. You know how I would’ve felt if you hadn’t made it back? If I woke up to a phone call that something happened to you and I could’ve been there to stop it.”</p><p>Sam’s face softened. “Hey,” he tried.</p><p>“Why didn’t you trust me?” he asked, his breathing labored.</p><p>Sam knew it wasn’t just about the rescue mission. “You know what people say about people like me.” His eyes hardened. “Not just Pratt but people on the street? It was even worse when I was growing up. I didn’t even know there was a word for what I am until I was twenty-two. And even then, it was because one of my commanders thought they should send in the army to demolish Professor X’s freak camp.”</p><p>“That’s awful.”</p><p>“It’s life. I was born with these wings. I didn’t ask to be, but I got it all the same. I used to think I was lucky because I can hide them. Then I realized it just meant I’d come into contact with people who felt comfortable saying that anti mutant shit around me because they didn’t know I was one of them. They didn’t know I wasn’t normal.” He shook his head. “I signed up for the Falcon Initiative because I could finally know what it felt like to fly.”</p><p>He looked to Bucky, his eyes bright. “It was the greatest day of my life. And it was the worst. I knew, deep down, I could’ve known what that felt like all my life if my parents had sent me somewhere where I could’ve been proud of who I was.”</p><p>He cleared his throat, his eyes wet before he averted his gaze, wiping at his face. “I grew up ashamed. That was my life.” He nodded his head towards the living room. “I couldn’t just leave her there to die.”</p><p>“I’m sorry.” Bucky didn’t know what else to say. His hands itched to touch Sam. To hug him, comfort him in some way. He wasn’t sure it would be welcomed.</p><p>“Not your fault,” Sam said with a sad smile. He turned, heading down the hall to his bedroom. He stopped just outside his door. “I just wanted you to know that I didn’t hide this from you because I didn’t trust you. Goodnight.”</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Child Protective Services wouldn’t take Mia.   </p><p>“I’m sorry, but after New York and Sokovia and the Snap, there aren’t any foster families willing to take in… special children,” she finished awkwardly, trying her best to stay strong in the face of Bucky’s glower. “Seeing as the government will only offer funding to shelters specifically intended for children like her, we can’t house her in one of our facilities.”</p><p>“Why can’t she go to one of the intended shelters? She’s only three years old.” Mia squirmed in his arms, reaching out for the half-eaten banana in Bucky’s hand. She’d been tired of it a few minutes ago but now she wanted it back. Sam eventually gave up trying to hold her still and handed her to Bucky.</p><p>Flustered, Bucky focused on trying not to drop her. In her short time with them, he hadn’t actually touched her yet. He didn’t trust himself to be gentle enough with adults, let alone tiny humans. She didn’t seem concerned, happy to bite into the fruit once more. Shaking his head at the strange warmth in his chest, he managed to find a comfortable way to hold her.</p><p>“The shelters are full, I’m afraid. I can get her on a waiting list. That’s the best I can do.” She stepped away as Sam bit as his lip, fuming.</p><p>He paced a few steps, muttering to himself. “This is it? This is how the system works?”</p><p>Bucky leaned against the wall, unsurprised. “It doesn’t help everyone. Steve and I were lucky we made it out okay, but we had each other.”</p><p>He stared down at Mia, smiling when big brown eyes stared up at him curiously. She smiled, holding out the fruit. It was mushy and covered in saliva, but he supposed it was the thought that countered. “No, thanks. You keep that.”</p><p>She shrugged, resting her head on his chest. She was so small, her wings curled in as she laid there. It seemed impossible that anyone looking at her wouldn’t feel compelled to help her.</p><p>“Maybe Fury knows someone that’ll take her,” Sam mused.</p><p>Bucky pushed off the wall, following Sam down the hall. He chose his words carefully. “Sam, are you sure about this?”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Handing her off to someone else.” Sam stopped, staring at him. “Maybe you should take her.”</p><p>Sam blinked at him. “You know what we do for a living.”</p><p>Bucky shrugged. “You wouldn’t be the first to have a kid and do this job. Scott did it.”</p><p>“Scott has a partner.”</p><p>“So, do you,” he replied, face warming at the amusement in Sam’s eye. “You know what I mean. I’m not going to leave you to take care of a kid alone.”</p><p>Sam thought this over, watching Mia finish the rest of her banana. A soft smile spread across his face, the sight only worsening the warm flutter in Bucky’s chest.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>They turned their small gym into a bedroom.</p><p>They took apart the traps hidden around the apartment and found a locker for Bucky’s small arsenal. They bought a child sized bed and bought clothes and a few toys.</p><p>Sam came home one day as Bucky was opening a can of pink paint.</p><p>Dropping his keys, Sam smiled tentatively, “You planning on redecorating your room?”</p><p>Bucky rolled his eyes, prying the can open. He tugged his shirt overhead, setting it aside. Sam nearly missed what he said next. “And no, it’s for Mia. C’mere. Help me with this.”</p><p>Sam grabbed a paint roller.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Of course, Bucky got more paint on himself than the walls and, in turn, decided to hug Sam and spread the wealth.</p><p>Sam grabbed first shower washing off as much as he could. Bucky caught him as he was climbing out, his back turned to the doorway as he wrapped a towel around his waist. It was the first time Bucky got a really good look at his back, the sight leaving him breathless.</p><p>Dark, silken intricate lines curved and winded down Sam’s smooth dark skin, almost embedded inside. They formed in the shape of feathers, but the ends curled into patterns that would be damn near impossible to replicate. Winding down Sam’s back, over his spine and trailing off at his lower back. It looked like a tattooed work that would’ve taken hours upon hours to perform. simply put, they were beautiful.</p><p>“You can touch them.” Bucky startled, looking up to find Sam studying him in the mirror. His face was unreadable, but he didn’t seem wary.</p><p>Swallowing, Bucky entered the room, reaching out hesitantly. His fingers carefully traced the lines. He’d expected them to be textured, but they weren’t. They didn’t feel different at all. His finger pad rolled over the cut of Sam’s muscle and he shivered, droplets of water rolling down his back.</p><p>“Does that hurt?” Bucky rasped, catching Sam’s eye in the mirror.</p><p>“No,” Sam breathed. “Feels nice actually.”</p><p>Nodding, Bucky continued, following the curved lines down to the center of Sam’s back. He was in uncharted waters now, having never touched Sam this much or seen this much of him since that night. Heat pooled in his center, coursing through his blood. His fingers were calloused, his touch soft as every brush of his fingers seemed to send shivers up Sam’s spine. He wondered if Sam was more sensitive here.</p><p> Sam’s voice was husky. “You want the shower?”</p><p>He turned, eyes dark where they met Bucky’s. Bucky’s hand slid down Sam’s front, palm spreading out across his stomach. Sam’s breath caught, his stomach tensing beneath Bucky’s hand. The space between them shrinking as Bucky moved in closer, his eyes falling to his hand on Sam’s skin.</p><p>“Buck,” Sam whispered, drawing his gaze.</p><p>Reaching up, Bucky cupped the back of Sam’s head as he darted forward, crushing their mouths together. Groaning, Sam leaned into Bucky as he brought his other hand up to touch Sam’s face, tracing his thumb over Sam’s cheek. His mouth fell open, welcoming Bucky’s tongue.</p><p>After a year and a half of barely touching at all, it felt like drowning. Indulging in something he’d never thought he’d have a chance of having. Sam practically bare in front of him, warm and wet from the shower. Sam’s mouth on his, his hands grasping at Bucky’s shirt to keep him close. Hands sliding beneath the hem of Bucky’s shirt and touching his bare skin.</p><p>With a moan, Bucky pressed Sam into the counter, his hand palming Sam’s lower back and drawing a gasp.</p><p>“Sam? Bucky?” a voice called out, the front door slamming closed.</p><p>“Shit,” Sam cursed, pulling back. His eyes squeezed shut. “Sharon.”</p><p>Bucky pressed their heads together, catching his breath. “I’ll go. You need to put clothes on.” He took a step back, running a hand through his hair.</p><p>Sam touched his mouth, tracing over his kiss bitten lips, the sight making Bucky’s cock pulse. His eyes met Sam’s, the hunger there reassuring him that this would be continued later. “Go,” Sam said with a smile. “Seriously, get out of here. I’m trying to be responsible.”</p><p>“You’re always responsible,” he replied, earning an eyeroll. He stole another kiss before leaving the room.</p><p>He found Sharon standing in the foyer, Mia hanging off of her back. Upon seeing Bucky, Mia beamed, her smile like the first rays of sunlight. It warmed Bucky to his core, drawing him closer as he picked her up.</p><p>“Hey, how’s my girl?”</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>The strangest thing about being parents was how easily Mia fit into their lives.</p><p>One of them managed to stay with her during the day while the other went to meetings. When a situation called for Captain America and the Winter Soldier, Cassie watched her. They’d have to figure something else out when summer ended and she went back to school, but, for the time being, they made it work. Their only real examples were Scott and Hope and Reed Richards and Sue Storm.</p><p>They’d all had the same advice: make sure Mia knew how to protect herself.</p><p>When she turned five, Bucky took on training her in hand to hand. Sam hadn’t liked the idea but, when even Sharon agreed, he had no other choice. Still, it hadn’t been easy for either of them to watch her learn to throw punches.</p><p>Of course, Sam took over teaching her to fly. They took a trip upstate and found an empty field near the old Avengers facility. Sam hadn’t asked Bucky to give him privacy initially, but Bucky did anyway. He’d never asked and Sam had never said, but he knew Sam hadn’t flown without his gear in a long, long time.</p><p>So, Bucky watched from the windows with Mia as he showed her around the facility.</p><p>Sam stumbled a few times. When he got the hang of it, he tested himself, going higher and higher into the sky. The tension melted from his body as he rose up into the air. Bucky paused mid-sentence, watching as Sam soared through the sky gracefully. Brightly colored wings outstretched and glittering in the sun. Deep shades of red giving way to white feathers at the ends, powerful and strong as Sam picked up speed that was damn near unbelievable.</p><p>He came to a stop in front of the windows, relaxed and grinning at them. There was such a light that bloomed from within him, radiant and striking in the sunlight. If it were possible, Bucky would’ve sworn he fell in love with Sam all over again in that moment.</p><p>He was beautiful.</p><p>“Can I do that?” Mia asked, looking to Bucky in question.</p><p>“Someday, kiddo.”</p><p>When Sam touched down, Bucky headed outside with Mia. They’d fashioned one of Hope’s old costumes for her. Her dark blue wings spread out, almost nervously as she joined Sam in the field. She followed Sam’s instructions, her arms outstretched. Her wings shown in swatches of deep indigo giving way to vibrant shades of violet.</p><p>As they rose into the air, Bucky couldn’t help but worry he’d one day be left behind.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>They’d been at the grocery store when Mia accidentally knocked over a box of animal crackers. Not entirely worthy of noting except she bent over to pick them up muttering, “Shit,” under her breath.</p><p>Bucky tensed, his eyes cutting to Sam’s to see if he’d heard. He had, of course, sparing Bucky a light glare as he ducked down in front of her. “Baby, we can’t say words like that.”</p><p>“What?” she asked, her head cocked to the side adorably. The furrow in her brow was painfully familiar. Sam gave Bucky that look all the time. “What word? Shit?”</p><p>Bucky stifled a laugh, forcing a straight face as he said. “Watch your mouth, kid.”</p><p>“You first,” she said, staring at him expectantly. “You said it yesterday.”</p><p>“I did not.” He was arguing with a child.</p><p>“Did so! You were making me breakfast and you burned your finger,” she pointed to the band aid on his hand.</p><p>Sam simply stared at him, brows raised. Sighing, Bucky let out a slow breath. “I shouldn’t use words like that either.”</p><p>Mia thought this over for a moment before shrugging. She put the animal crackers in the cart and continued down the aisle. “Can I still say fuck?”</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>It was rare that Sam and Bucky got nights to themselves.</p><p>They tried not to take advantage of Doreen, their new nanny. So, they only called when absolutely necessary. On this night, Hope had offered to take Mia for the weekend. She’s suggested it as a girls’ weekend but Mia had begged for more training and Hope was glad to help. Besides, Sharon had missed her and was planning on bringing movies and snacks along, too.</p><p>Bucky had planned a nice dinner and even bought a peach cobbler from the diner Sam loved. He might as well have laid out a bowl of trail mix for how much attention Sam paid to it. The second the door opened, he had Bucky’s shirt on the floor and started working on his belt.</p><p>Humming, Bucky carefully side-stepped Mia’s bike helmet and a pile of shoes on the floor. “You’re eager.” Sam yanked his belt off and tossed it aside, guiding Bucky back towards his bedroom. “Has it been a while?”</p><p>Sam pushed him down on the bed, sliding out of his pants and climbing over him on the bed. “You know it has. The last time we had sex, it was a two-minute hand job in the shower and that was pure luck.”</p><p>Bucky spread his hands over Sam’s stomach, chewing on his lip. “You know, we’d have better luck if I just slept here.”</p><p>Sam paused, sinking back on Bucky’s lap. “I don’t know.”</p><p>“We’ve been dating for nearly two years. We’re raising a kid together.”</p><p>“It’s not that,” Sam said, covering his face. “We’d have to explain this to her.”</p><p>The words gave Bucky pause. They’d been careful not to touch too much in front of her. Kisses behind closed doors and when she was sure not to be home. AT the time, Bucky hadn’t questioned it. What if this didn’t work out? What if Sam came to his senses and then she’d be confused about whether things ending between Sam and Bucky meant one of them would be moving out.</p><p>Shit, was that possible?</p><p>“I just didn’t want to have her get used to this in case you decide this isn’t what you want anymore,” Sam finished.</p><p>Wait. “What?” He tugged Sam’s hand down, meeting his gaze. “Sam, what are you talking about?”</p><p>Sam didn’t answer right away, his hands turning over to twine their fingers together. “We work together, we live together, we’re raising a kid together. If this part doesn’t work out… if <em>we</em> don’t work out, I don’t want to lose what we have.” He offered a small smile. “I love what we have.”</p><p>The ugly knot in Bucky’s throat untangled a bit, his voice rough, “I do, too. I love you, Sam.” Sam’s eyes widened, a soft brown in the lamplight. “I love you so much it scares me.”</p><p>“Me too,” Sam said, his eyes crinkling in the corners. “I love you, too.”</p><p>Chest tightening, Bucky swallowed thickly as his heart lodged in his throat. “Trust me, I’m scared I’ll fuck this up, too. But I’m not scared of you. You hold us together.”</p><p>Sam shook his head, the fondness in his eyes quelling the nervous flutter in Bucky’s stomach. He leaned over, rising up as he pressed their lips together, Bucky’s hands coming up above his head on the bed. He smiled, murmuring, “No, I don’t. You do.”</p><p>He stretched out over Bucky, his lips falling to his throat. Bucky’s hands squeezed tight around Sam’s, aching with the need to touch.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>One night, Bucky awoke with a start, his heart racing.</p><p>Sam was fast asleep beside him on his stomach, no sign of trouble. Bucky laid there trying to figure out what had woken him when he heard another scream.</p><p>He shot out of bed, darting down the hall and into Mia’s room. He found her tossing and turned restless in bed, beads of sweat on her forehead. He turned her bedside lamp on, shaking her gently. “Mia? Hey, kid, wake up.”</p><p>Her mouth opened in a silent scream, the sight chilling his blood. Her eyes opened with a shout as he pulled her in close, running his hand over her head. She wrapped her arms tight around his neck, shaking in terror. “It’s okay. You’re safe. Daddy’s here. You’re safe,” he murmured.</p><p>“I was back there and that man was going to cut me open and I tried to find you but you weren’t there. You weren’t there, Daddy,” she cried, her face wet where it pressed against his neck.</p><p>Not for the first time, Bucky wished he’d blown that place before leaving it. He’d been so worried about getting Sam and Mia home. He hadn’t thought about anything else. “I’m sorry, baby. They can’t hurt you now.”</p><p>She held him tight as her breathing calmed. “Do you get scared?” she whispered.</p><p>“Yes, sweetheart. I do.” All the time. More for his family than himself.</p><p>She sat back, staring up at him with big brown eyes as he wiped her face. “What do you do?”</p><p>“I have your Dad,” he said simply, that familiar warmth settling in his chest. “Whenever I have bad dreams, I just hold onto him.”</p><p>“Did you have a bad dream tonight?” He shook his head. “Can I hug Dad?”</p><p>Huffing out a laugh, Bucky nodded. “Sure thing.”</p><p>“Okay,” she said, sliding out of bed. “Let’s go.”</p><p>Realization set in as she grabbed her Captain Marvel doll. “I thought you’d just want him to come in here with you.”</p><p>“But what if you get scared?” she asked, staring up at him. “Come on,” she grabbed his hand and pulled him forward.</p><p> Bucky fought a smile as he followed. “You’re a sweet kid. You definitely got that from Sam.”</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>When she slept, Mia wrapped herself in feathers.</p><p>Curled up on the sofa, warming herself with her wings. Bucky found it adorable, but he knew it worried Sam. Her wings couldn’t be hidden the same way Sam’s could. They weren’t sure if that was due to her youth or if her mutation was completely different. Sam had explained that he hadn’t been able to tuck his away until he was about twelve years old, and even then, it had taken years for the color to blend into his skin.</p><p>“You really want to tell her to hide?” Bucky asked as he chopped vegetables for dinner that night.</p><p>“No, I really don’t,” Sam said honestly. He set the water to boil, leaning back against the counter. “But what choice do I have? My parents had to have the talk with me. I’m sure they struggled with it too. No one wants to have to tell their child that they have to hide parts of themselves because strangers may try to hurt them. But when you’re black and you’re a mutant, you have to learn.”</p><p>Bucky held his gaze, chewing on his lip. “I hate this, Sam.”</p><p>Sam’s eyes softened. “Come here.” He pulled Bucky into his arms, kissing his temple.</p><p>“I hate that you have to do this and I hate that it was done to you.” He sighed, breathing Sam in. “And I know it’s not about me.”</p><p>“No, it’s not,” Sam mused. “But you have to be here because she’s your kid, too.”</p><p>Bucky nodded, wrapping his arms around Sam’s waist. “I’m glad she has you.”</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>One night, Bucky sat up in bed reading through one of Carol’s reports.</p><p>Sam entered, quietly padding over to bed, lost in thought. His chest was bare, the marks of his wings glossy where they lined his skin. He lay down on his back, staring up at the ceiling.</p><p>“So, tonight was… something,” he began.</p><p>Bucky shook his head, “That’s a word for it.”</p><p>“She hates my meatloaf.” He frowned adorably, earning a laugh as Bucky kissed his cheek.</p><p>“I’m surprised, too. But I don’t think it was just about the meatloaf.”</p><p>“She looked me in the eye and said ‘Dad, I hate your meatloaf’. She said that to my face.”</p><p>“I’m sorry. You know, the other day, I tried to help her tie her shoes and she growled at me. Teeth bared and everything.” Sam laughed, grinning up at him. “I was upset about it but, then I realized that maybe she doesn’t need me to help her tie her shoes anymore. She’s growing up.”</p><p>“She’s only five.”</p><p>“Sam, you know that wasn’t just about your meatloaf.” Sam quieted, his face falling. Sighing, Bucky slid down in the bed beside him, pulling on his arm so he’d rest his head on Bucky’s chest. “She wants to go to school.”</p><p>“The idea of her being around kids that’ll say the same stupid shit their as their parents… I don’t want that for her.”</p><p>“There’s another option.” Sam stiffened, his hand tightening in Bucky’s shirt. “Babe, we talked about this.”</p><p>“I’m not shipping her off.”</p><p>“Xavier’s school is upstate, we can visit and you know she’ll be safe. You never wanted her to feel the way you did growing up. This way, she’ll have friends and ids her own age. She won’t feel like an outsider.” He peeked down at Sam’s face, seeing that he was thinking it over. He pressed a kiss to the top of Sam’s head. “You don’t have to decide right now.”</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Despite pushing for it, Bucky had the hardest time leaving Mia at Xavier’s.</p><p>“If you need anything, you let us know. It doesn’t matter what. And you call twice a day, okay?”</p><p>“Buck,” Sam said, touching his arm.</p><p>“Twice a day,” Bucky repeated, holding her gaze firmly. She nodded, fighting a smile as Bucky finally stood, letting out a slow breath. Mia rushed forward, burying her face in his stomach as she wrapped her arms around him.</p><p>“You’ll be fine, Daddy. Don’t worry.”</p><p>Bucky huffed out a laugh, hugging her tight. She pulled away, taking Ororo’s hand as she led her inside. She turned back, offering a wave.</p><p>When she disappeared inside, Sam pulled Bucky into a hug. “She’ll be fine,” he murmured.</p><p>Bucky nodded, but, with every step towards the car, he felt like he was leaving part of heart behind.  </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Bucky woke up one morning to find himself wrapped in feathers.</p><p>Waking slowly, it took a few moments for him to realize what he was feeling. Sam was fast asleep, having curled over Bucky’s back in the night. The feathers were a first for them. Bucky had thought only Mia slept this way. Gazing up at the canopy of deep red feathers, Bucky felt warm and oddly safe. Sunlight streamed in through the windows, illuminating the intricate stripes of gold and crimson spread throughout.</p><p>“Sam?”</p><p>Sam woke with a start, pulling back. “Sorry.”</p><p>“It’s fine. Really.” He turned over, still wrapped in the cradle of wings. “Is this normal for you?”</p><p>Sam slowly put them away, rolling over onto his stomach. “Not exactly. I usually sleep with a shirt on as a reminder.</p><p>The words didn’t sit well with Bucky. He traced the lines on Sam’s back, choosing his words carefully. “Is there a reason you keep them in all the time?”</p><p>“We live in a tiny New York apartment.”</p><p>Bucky didn’t think twice before asking, “Would you want to move someplace bigger?” Sam looked to him in surprise. “It’s just… I don’t want you to feel like you have to hide all the time. Especially around me.”</p><p>Hearing about Sam’s childhood had stuck with him for quite some time. All that time alone, each birthday shared with only Sam’s parents. When they went to Xavier’s to visit Mia, he saw how Sam watched her with both pride and envy. Mia was growing up being taught that she was perfect just the way she was. Sam had never had that.</p><p>“You’d move upstate? Away from civilization?”</p><p>“There are people upstate.” He sat up, not a doubt in his mind. “Sam, I’ll go anywhere you want to go. I want you to feel comfortable. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”</p><p>Sam sat up beside him, his eyes warm and soft, gleaming in the sunlight. He pulled Bucky into a kiss. “Thank you,” he murmured.</p><p>And honestly, Bucky would give Sam the world if it meant earning a kiss like that.</p><p> </p><hr/><p>
  <em>Years later<br/></em>
</p><p>The AIM soldier slammed his boot into Bucky’s chest.</p><p>As he went over the side of the building, he cursed the lecture Sam would be sure to give him later. Hands grabbed him by the harness on his back, a brief flip in his stomach before he was soaring through the air.</p><p>“Seriously, Daddy? What the hell?” Mia chided.</p><p>“Watch the mouth!”</p><p>“You first!” she shouted, laughing breathlessly as she carried him down the ground below.</p><p>She dropped down, marching next to him. Bucky hadn’t exactly approved of her joining SHIELD but, after five years of training, he’d managed to quell the heart palpitations when he saw her in uniform. She wore all black and combat boots with a silver sleeve on her left to honor her father. He hadn’t told her how that made him feel.</p><p>It didn’t matter that Sam had found her, that it had been Sam’s name alone on the adoption papers. With Bucky’s history, they’d thought it best to leave him off if they wanted any chance of keeping her. Bucky had never told Sam but, for about seven years, he’d felt like less of her parent because of it.</p><p>But he saw the ways Mia took after him. The way she charged into fights headstrong and halfcocked, the way she smarted herself out of situations a little too big for her. The way she nearly bested him at darts and was the only junior agent to win over Hill on the sharp shooting exam on her first try. The way she, unfortunately, quickly gained a reputation for leaving a string of broken hearts throughout her training class. The way her mouth twisted when she was biting down a snarky reply and the way she brought out the puppy dog eyes when she was trying to win over Sam.</p><p>She was every bit Bucky’s daughter and he was every bit her father.</p><p>He held out his arm and Mia shook her head with a grin, tapping her fist to his. “You ready?” she asked, planting her foot.</p><p>“Quit your yappin’. It’s not Take Your Daughter to Work Day!” he shouted, charging forward.</p><p>Laughing, Mia leapt into the air, taking flight. Soaring high as Sam skirted down beneath her. They weaved through the skies, Sam all grace and Mia all power. Beaming up at her, a thought occurred; one he’d settled on several years ago.</p><p>She was the best of both of them.   </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Come visit me on <a href="http://capnwinghead.tumblr.com/">tumblr!</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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